So mine moved last week. After 30 years in one house they "downsized" to a new place which is 50% BIGGER than the old place. This has apparently resulted in a space crunch. Yeah, you read that correctly. My mother has mentioned that she's going to have to ship my piano to me b/c there's nowhere to put it in the new house. My house would fit in their entertainment room. She is insane. Also insane, deciding she didn't like the $30 charge per to keep the old telephone numbers (yeah we had two phone lines in the old house – they liked to call each other from different rooms) – their numbers for 30 years! – and so they have new ones now. Except they haven't told me what they are. If they weren't such maniacs about me (see my moving across the country to get away) I would think they were trying to send me a subtle message.

Little do they know they have presented me with an excellent opportunity … if I were to move suddenly and change my mobile number, they'd never find me again.  It may be time to drop "Kiki" and come up with a new name.

And everyone came except the birthday boy?

Because no one remembered to call and tell him about the party.

And this was before the bubbly corks were popped!

Sigh.  Colossal oversight bites us in the ass last night.  That is until birthday boy showed up after receiving a phone call from the BFF-in-law at 7 pm letting him know that he needed to get to the party site pronto!  Luckily everyone involved found the entire thing hilarious (mounds of appetizers and drinks while we waited certainly helped) and really, at least he got a birthday party this year.  Five years ago his birthday was cancelled for reasons too long to get into.  Which means he's a year younger than his birth certificate.  Fact!

Said the sign over the door at the party last eve.  As mentioned yesterday, it is Stampede here in Calgary which means fake cowboys making the moves on the fake cowgirls.  And pancakes.  Lots of pancakes.  I was actually at a breakfast party last year where they ran out of pancakes.  Quelle horreur!  It caused a mini stampede of angry hungry fake cowpeople!

So it is Stampede around here which means pancakes, drinks, cowboys (of the real and fake variety) and no sleeping.  For 10 days straight.  I have been told by someone from Alabama with a pancake fascination (really, she's focusing on the wrong part of Stampede) that this all sounds crazy and so have decided to attempt to keep track of the flirting.  Or at least tell funny stories about it.

This is also my first attempt at an LJ cut.  Some kind soul from Rhode Island explained how to do it.  Let's see how many attempts it takes me to get it right.  Really, this all seems like so much work.  Inertia is tired.


 

Has it really been two months since I last posted? No wonder certain friends have been putting the screws to me lately. In honour of my return to the LJ I have changed my screen appearance. I suspect this will happen many more times so just get used to it. This one is appropriate b/c I was just back east at a funeral. Where I got set up on a date. Is it wrong to procure a date while attending a funeral? I once secured a date invitation while driving to Banff. I was going there to spend the St. Patrick's Day weekend drinking green beer with my ex. He asked why I was late getting to the hotel … um, b/c that gorgeous argentinian fellow driving in the car beside mine pulled up beside me at the Minnewanka Loop, rolled down his window and told me I was a very good driver. Compliment my driving and YES to dinner is pretty much a given.

So here we are. I have been told that my rambling brain thoughts are interesting and LJ-worthy.  I'd believe that more if it had been about my driving.

The problem with hanging out with prolific writers is that eventually they force (read ambush) you into ceasing all activities as a houseguest on their LJ's and cajole (read ambush) you into opening up your own LJ.

Does anyone hear you freak out in the dead of space?

Notwithstanding that this page is likely under serious construction for the conceivable future (icons? cuts? what are these things?), welcome to the inaugural launch of csm37.  I suspect if you're here, it's b/c you're eagerly anticipating an interview I recently had the privilege of securing with the creators and writers of the reimagined BSG 4.5 based on the reimagined BSG based on the original BSG.

May I present the first in an ongoing series:

The Interview

CSM: You've decided to re-write a fairly recent screen adaption. Did it worry either of you that fans would react negatively to this re-imagining of BSG 4.5 based on the reimagined BSG of the original BSG?

Tara: Nah. I mean we don’t really care about the fans. Unless they agree with us and tell us we’re brilliant. In fact, what we really like to do is ask them for prompts and then completely disregard them! Or give them the exact opposite of what they ask for! Haha, that’s some good times. Keeps them on their feet too.

But you know, if they like it, that’s great. If they don’t, well, they can just reimagine their own version. That’s the beauty with reimaginings, you can just imagine up anything you like. Maybe even a pigeon. Pigeons are awesome right?

Bee: You know, there was a really strong Pro-Pigeon movement that we were concerned about. And there were a lot of fans of the old reimagined show that really preferred the characters the way they were. And some of those old fans were really invested in seeing a story that didn’t make sense. But Tara and I just looked at each other and said No way. Adama’s got to stop being a jackass, Lee needs an actual job with a title, Kara needs to stay in the same plane of existence as everyone else, and we need an ending that makes sense. It was controversial, and we knew it was gonna piss some people off, but that’s exactly why we had to do it. Because it was scary.

CSM: I think it's fair to say that reimagined BSG was a powerful snapshot about the world we live in and it maintained that high quality of having the pulse of our world right up to the end when it was revealed that God did it. God was the ultimate puppet master. Why are you looking to inflame the religious right by juxtaposing that in fact, after years of relentless pursuit across the galaxies, near starvation, sacrifice, the uniting of two different races, learning from past prejudices, etc. that these characters would be inclined to behave differently? Where did that idea come from and why do you expect an audience to believe it?

B: Well basically, we just figured that there might be some people happy with a non deus ex machina ending. Plus, our God ships K/L, so we had to do something about that.

T: *blank expression* Uh, that’s a good question. You know, it’s really difficult to say. Where do ideas come from? I know I think up my best ideas in the bathroom. While I’m showering, or brushing my teeth. I like to brush my teeth a lot. Hmm…see, now that gives me an idea…

CSM: Seems to me that if humanity is to survive then there needs to be more children being born in the fleet. Thus far the whiteboard count keeps going down and there have been hardly any little nuggets produced by any of the main characters. Are you planning to introduce fertility treatments on Galactica to result in multiple births?

B: Hmmmm ... Not fertility treatments per se, but we certainly are upping the sexin’ quotient (at least among the newly-minted President/Admiral demographic). The way we see it, babies have a better chance of being born if people have sex. And by people, we mean not just the over 60 set.

And while we’re at it? Let’s just be clear: Love ain’t got nothing to do with birthin’ babies. Cylon or human, procreation goes back to what everyone learned in 8^th grade biology class. Simple as that.

T: Well, in fact, we’ve been sneaking some fertility enhancements into the reprocessed algae, so by the end of the season, I think you’re going to be very pleased with the number of pregnancies and rugrats we’ll be incorporating. Helo and Sharon are gonna have triplets in the season finale in fact.

B: TARA!

T: Oh wait, is that a spoiler? Oh, whoops yeah, sorry about that. Don’t worry about it though because we’ll probably just cut it and let it be a deleted scene for the DVDs.

CSM: Kids love pets. Any plans for more dogs or cats or birds to start roaming Galactica?

T: It’s funny you should mention that because I had a great idea in the shower the other day. This vision came to me of a little robotic dog that could maybe follow Baltar around and just hump his leg every few episodes. Wouldn’t that be great? Maybe we’ll even name the dog Rondymore. That would be a great tribute, a real homage, don’t you think? Subtle too.

B: Well, we had built a whole storyline around giving Lee a parrot named ‘Pigeon’ who was really the reincarnated spirit of Daniel, who, with Hera’s help, would actually be able to explain all the Space Magic and the higher power in charge of everything. But that storyline hurt our brains so much, and we kept falling into so many plotholes that we had to just say “screw it.” And so, no parrot. I’m still torn up about it.

CSM: Booze has played a big role in this series. Any plans to turn the Rising Star into the fleet's distillery? If so, how do you plan to have Chief divide his time between living on the Baseship, repairing Galactica and making the grog? Any worries that audience members won't buy into this endless supply of liquor storyline?

B: It was definitely a concern. I mean seriously, how long would a group with a limited liquor supply and liquor-making capabilities be able to sustain a fleet of raging alcoholics? It was definitely a corner that we had to plot our way out of. Sex certainly helped. Getting a lot of our characters into functional relationships certainly decreased the liquor consumption on Galactica. Now that Roslin and Adama have hooked up, he’s hitting the bottle less. And Starbuck? Who knew that if she could just get some lovin’ from Lee on a regular basis that she could find a substitute for drinking her cares away? Think of the alcohol we could have saved and the livers we could have spared if the reimagined show could have thought of this sooner.

T: *sounds of clinking glasses are heard* Wha? Dichu say shumthin bout too mush booze? I don’ thick thaz pobsisle—pozbissle---po--... Eh thaz whack.

B: *shoots glare at Tara* Also, with Saul Tigh’s death, the fleet liquor consumption dropped by 22% alone. I love Tigh, but I’m just sayin’.

CSM: We know from the reimagined BSG that all this has happened before and will happen again. With that in mind, have either of you destroyed your personal roombas and instead started using child labour for general clean up around your homes?

T: How did you find out about that? Godsdammit. ROSARITA, UNLOCK THE BASEMENT DOOR!!! HURRY UP!!

B: I actually don’t live in a house anymore because technology is in fact, The Devil. I built a hut in the backyard and will camp out there for the foreseeable future. It’s just that I had this epiphany while I was in the shower one morning and I thought: It’s the coffee maker, stupid! One day, that damn coffee maker is going to become sentient and try to kill me with a fine grind African blend. So I’ve got to get rid of that sucker and all other helpful technologically advanced devices and live off the land. My neighbors think I’m kinda weird but I just try to explain that our hearts have always outgrown our brains which in turn outgrows our common sense which tells us we should not be in the business of progress anymore. It’s really quite simple.

CSM: There's been a lot of speculation that this could result in a network pick-up. Have you given any thought as to whether you'd like to see that happen? What happens to some of the more graphic content you've described if one of the big three greenlights this project?

T: Look I’ve heard some really crazy things.  Like people passing out and dying as a result of the content.  There was even talk of getting the surgeon general to put a warning label on some of our episodes.  It’s crazy.  You know what, people, the mutiny was not that bad!  So a few people got bloodied and we killed a couple cylons.  There’s worse stuff happening on network programs.  What’s the point of being on cable if you can’t push the boundaries a little?

B: Well, we all know NBC/Universal is in a bit of creative slump right now (having handed the prime-time keys over to Leno five nights a week), so I think they could use the fresh ideas. And what idea is fresher than a reimagined reimagined show? I mean, come on—nobody’s doing that yet. We are breaking new ground in science fiction—and maybe just with fiction in general. Plus, the more we can push the envelope and piss people off and blow shit up, the more people will think that this show is great and relevant and actually means something deep and profound.

CSM: Along that same topic, neither of you seems to have any difficulty with killing off your characters. At what point have you deaded so many that you've written yourself into a corner and subsequently have to come up with some fantastical explanation for their continued presence? Or do you just not care and plan to re-introduce them randomly as your story develops?

T: You know it’s always sad to see people go. But look we’re artists. We’re making ART here. Not widgets. We need to be free to dispense with those characters who no longer fit our storylines. And you know, it’s the nature of episodic television that things change. From week to week, sometimes we don’t know who our main characters are gonna be. Maybe in one episode the Admiral will die or get kidnapped or something and we’ll do something completely off the wall like take some random guy from CIC who you’ve only seen two or three times—less even if you didn’t watch the webisodes—and make him the new Admiral. Why not, right? It’s good to keep changing things up. I think if you ask them—not that I ever do—you’ll find the audience likes to be surprised.

B: You know, I think we’re cool. We always have the Super-Duper Secret Extra Final Cylons that we haven’t mentioned yet.

T: BEE!!

B: Um, yeah so if we ever need to bring someone back or retcon a plot—or if we just get really drunk and bored one night and decide that hey, maybe Boxey should be revealed to be the One True God with two episodes to go before the finale, then we can always do that.

T: BEE!!

CSM: Are you ever scared by the enormity of the world you're writing about? By that I mean, do you ever look at the characters that have been handed to you by the creators of reimagined BSG and the original BSG and freak out that there's no way you can possibly make all the obvious relationships work when you have characters getting in the way of each other? First and foremost, obviously, I am curious how it is you plan to extricate yourself from this Lee/Kara entanglement so you can move forward with the obvious set-up of Kara and Karl which has been there from the start when Kara went back to Caprica to save him and which you are continuing by appointing Captain Agathon as XO of Galactica?

B: Seriously? Ummm, ok. We need to have a chat. You know how in the old reimagined show, you could read whatever the hell you wanted into the subtext because the writers really didn’t know where they were going with anything? Yeah, well, this show’s not like that. We actually HAVE a plan. And we actually like couples and want them to be functional and happy instead of fucking with them (and their fans) for four seasons and leave everyone frustrated and upset at the end of it. So let me just say, Karl and Kara? NOT the endgame. Neither is Kara with anyone else other than a certain former CAG former Commander former quasi-lawyer former Caprican Delegate former emergency President now acting President. We clear?

T: Kara/Karl? Hmm, that could work. GET ME REWRITE!

B: TARA!